Saturday, May 21, 2022

Live your best life

Woke up to some snow.  Not the amount that they were projecting but I think there are areas around the metro area that did get quite a bit of wet snow.  I know one of my friends had a tree that was destroyed.  She lives in the Foothills where the snow was more prominent.

It's crazy how some days I can be very energized when teaching.  Like I want to bounce around my apartment or wherever I am teaching.  It is sort of nuts.  Initially, I only felt that this happened when I was not drinking.  However, the last few times it has happened, I have been enjoying beverages the previous night.  

Maybe it is a choice.  I choose to be full of energy and express it when I am teaching.  I need to plan my upcoming happy hour class, It is Tuesday, May 24th, at a retail shop on East Colfax.  I believe it will be great.  More people seem interested and the tribe is expanding.  I believe in what I am trying to accomplish.  

This is crazy that we are almost to June.  I feel like this year started yesterday. There has been more growth and opportunities.  Some heartbreak, frustration, conflict.  I know that I must figure out a car option at some time within the next six to eight months.  What is the best route?  Selling it outright?  Using a service to do it?  Trading it in?  

Today, my friend, Wes, asked me why I was so committed to Volvos,  Mostly, it is what I know.  I am comfortable with my mechanics.  I have multiples of them and have a rapport.  Starting over with a different vehicle would require new mechanics. And, I know what I am getting when thinking about purchasing a Volvo. A stable, safe car.  It can be sexy like my sedan was.  I loved that car. A two door sedan that had italian leather interior and all sorts of swagger.  I loved that car.

Unfortunately, I was t-boned on Super Bowl Sunday which ended that love affair.  It was not worth it to try to piece that car back together.  

I could try to go carless.  I could try.  I do not think it would be in my best interest.  I do enjoy having a car, being independent and capable.  I think I will take some time to think about exactly what I want.  Then, make it happen.

Trying to be more productive and establish a routine.  I have some opportunities.  My website is in the midst of getting developed, upcoming happy hour, park sessions in Denver and Santa Fe and the desire to think outside the box.  I do have other upcoming travel,  Trips for wine festivals and a bourbon trail.  I am loving life right now.  Maybe I can squeeze in a few more trips.

Friday, May 20, 2022


A few days in Santa Fe.  Then, home to snow.  And, honestly, after being in New Mexico, we desperately need moisture.  I should be rejoicing that it is snowing in Denver and encouraging more.  We went from 90 degrees to 40.  What a pendulum swing.

Lots of things to think about and plan.  My car, Calliope, has been a great vehicle.  About a year ago, I started feeling the con's of owning an older vehicle.  New battery in February.  New alternator/battery in April.  Bevel and angler in June.  Thoughts of a new transmission and told the price tag for a used one.  

Ten months later, new transmission need is a reality.  The cost of a used transmission increased by one thousand dollars.  Or I could invest in a Volvo specific transmission for the price tag of seven grand.  Seems insane.  Yet, my mechanic in Santa Fe suggested that that would be the route to go if I want to keep Calliope.  Otherwise, buying a used transmission has its own set of issues and uncertainties.  I started looking at available cars, volvo specific, and it is frightening.  My mechanic suggested going carless.

It feels like a transition is occurring and I should embrace it.  Not be frightened by it.  See where this path leads.  I am healthy.  Thankful.  And appreciative of what is coming next.  Another trip to Santa Fe for a pop up.  A trip to Kansas for my sister's vow renewal and some time in Washington State.  I might be able to manage a trip to Mexico, too.  I do not want to get hung up on the cost of things.  I want to enjoy my life and participate fully.

All I can do is continue to move forward with the belief that everything will work out.  And, it will.  I have had a spectacular week.  Fantastic meals in Santa Fe, soaking at Ojo Caliente, learning many things about a new friend, walking around Stenger facility with Jenny Minard and the knowledge that I have more possibilities.  

It is snowing in Denver!  Day at home to reflect, re-center, analyze.  Upcoming travel will happen. I foresee a few trips to Santa Fe over the summer.  I am stoked.

Thursday, May 12, 2022

Thankful Thursday

I am grateful for waking naturally and beginning my day.  I feel so much more productive when I do begin my day before 6 am.  I do not know why or what is motivating but already I have accomplished a few tasks while listening to John Mayer.  Yes, I am still in that head space.  Soulful, somewhat bubble gum poppish (some of the earlier music) and soothing.  

I will get ready to go for a run shortly.  Maintaining habits has been a focal part of 2022.  Not goal setting, specifically.  Forming habits and maintaining them seem to be more manageable and successful.  Why has it taken me so long to figure that out? 

Regardless, I am thankful for today and the opportunities that are available.  I will be in Santa Fe next week.  Prepping for a yoga pop up and a tour of mezcal.  I think I am just as excited to explore the mezcal scene as I am to teach.  Maybe even take a class for my own practice.  Yes, I need that inspiration for my own practice.  A giant reset button that enables refilling my own cup.  

Why do we always give, give, give and rarely attempt to replenish our own energy?  I have a friend that is going through many life changes currently.  New residence, contemplating retirement, health issues and maybe taking on more of a role for other family.  I feel for this person because there are so many variables being juggled/managed with less emphasis on what is beneficial to her.  It seems like they make a decision to handle something and than another area arises with just as much need to handle.  Sort of like whack a mole.  While managing the issues that come up, her own personal health and wellness is being neglected.  

I am thankful for access to clean water.  Incredibly grateful for that.  I wake up and want to shower immediately.  In addition, I love lemon water and hydration.  My routine is wake up, make bed, hot lemon water, juice something (lately--carrots, beets, celery, apple, lemon) and make coffee.  Afterwards, I can reflect and ensure that I have some sort of plan for tackling the day.  Today, for example, I will be going for a run shortly.  It is heating up in Denver and once it hits a certain heat index or level, my motivation to fun or be outside declines.  I foresee a hot, hot summer.  Not thrilled.  I keep praying for rain and relief.  Not only here but in New Mexico and other areas that are experiencing fires.  New Mexico is near and dear to me if you have not noticed.  It's been a few hot, smoky weeks with no end in sight.  They need rain!

What are you thankful for?  Instead of looking for problems, maybe look at what you have and be thankful.  Right now, it is imperative to find positivity and happiness. There are so many things to be uncertain about or dwell in a lower frequency vibe.  I have managed to avoid looking at the ramifications of some decisions that are trying to decrease autonomy for women.  That rabbit hole is vast and wide.  I will not sit back and allow things to be taken from me.  

On the most basic level, while I was receiving body work and taking care of myself, I thought of how this once was only offered to men.  Why cannot I take pride in having luxurious skin or enjoy sitting in a sauna?  Why are there spaces that are only operable for men?

I digress. I want to focus on the good and what makes me want to share my light.  Yoga.  Health. Travel.

Wednesday, May 11, 2022


Probably my favorite John Mayer song.  This beautiful love song of loss, new love and being comfortable (or at least to me that is what it is about).  I remember when my sister, Michaela, introduced me to him.  I think I played the CD nonstop for about six months.  

I thought of it today as I was texting a friend.  I got a body scrub today which is one of my favorite ways to self-care and focus on me.  I feel like a brand new penny after emerging from this service.  My skin feels luscious and hydrated.  

I thought of your body is a wonderland (because I felt that incredible.  But, that seems super cheesy to reference with a new friend).  Instead I made some comment about John Mayer.  That opened up an entirely new tangent.  I mentioned that I almost unleashed my inner fan girl in 2018 when I saw John Mayer sitting at the bar in Larimer Square.  I wanted to run over and gush but stopped myself.  I had just started that job I would have definitely been reprimanded for that particular move.

I asked my friend his plans for this evening and he said he was going to search youtube for John Mayer songs.  I sent him a link to Comfortable and have listened to it the last 20 minutes or so.  It is a beautiful song still.  I read some of the reviews of it and how heartbreaking some of the stories were of association.  

I do love this song.  Maybe that song will pop into my rolodex of randomness this upcoming weekend.  I think I am aware of the songs when I am at the restaurant.  

Today is my first happy hour yoga session.  I am uncertain if anyone will attend.  It's hot.  And windy.  Like starting over again.  The Detox happy hour is finally gaining traction and I realize it was all about being consistent and showing up when I said I would.  Trying new things and being open to wherever it leads.  I am not going to start being conventional now.

On that note, I was asked how often I treat myself to self-care.  I wasn't offended but then I thought about how it would sound to say--yes, I get a pedicure, facial, massage and body scrub monthly.  Or a combination of the four.  Instead, I focused on what I don't do. No manicures or coloring my hair.  I also don't wear makeup and so I can spend more money on body scrubs. I said I was a diva but limited diva.  I don't know if my friend beliecves me.

I think taking care of your skin is essential.  I will spend money to achieve this and the amount of relaxation acquired.  I am thankful for my tribe.  My tribe of friends, supporters, trainers, therapists, etc.  All of these people aid in my healing process.

I hope you get comfortable today.  I see a plethora of John Mayer songs in my future.

Tuesday, May 10, 2022

Productive day

It is Tuesday, right?  I am so confused about what day of the week it is.  Perhaps working that extra shift on Sunday threw me off my days.  I ran into a few friends and increased my intake of tequila shots.  It was a long night.
Today was about upcoming travel, admin and reflecting on where I am at currently.  I would like to do another SWOT and update some of the white board that I list tasks on.  Fill up my day with positive things to avoid the news and the possibility of the rabbit hole.  I met my trainer and did a mini intake.  Think reset.  We have danced around what I am trying to achieve for the last five months.  I give her a number and stay committed to it for a few weeks.  Then, I backslide.  
Restart and feel better for a little bit.  Backslide.  I am in a space that I am not super happy to be in.  Although, we both agree I look better than I thought I would.  Sometimes the number does not reflect the health.  
She had created a great sequence.  Good amount of core, legs and back.  Courtney has been my trainer since 2016.  She is familiar with my likes and dislikes.  Threw in some cardio and ropes today.  Yuck!  The ropes were how we finished the work out.  
Afterwards, I met with a financial planner to discuss some options.  I am very thankful for decisions I have made in my life.  I do not regret the amount of travel I have been fortunate to endure.  Yet, in hindsight, I wish I had paid more attention to some of my finances.  I could be in a different position.  Some of it is tied to childhood.  My mindset in regards to money.  I have had to work through all of that to gain a better perspective.  I listen to many podcasts and have read many books to reset my mindset.  Today, was beneficial since I enjoyed meeting the planner and feel confident about the decision.  
Next week, I will be in Santa Fe.  Yoga, Ojo Caliente and exploring the food scene with a chef should be enticing.  I think we are pursuing a pick your adventure type of dining experience. You know.  A beverage and a bite.  Pay.  Move on to next spot.  Another beverage and bite.  I doubt dessert will be included.  He seems more savory that sweet.
Still, I look forward to exploring the city.  I know there are new spots and older spots that I want to return to.  Pranzo, Cafe Zacatlan, La Choza (always La Choza).  Counter Culture has my favorite breakfast burrito and I have not frequented that recently.  Or DFG's  I could go for a cuban or new mexican sandwich.  They used to have the best potatas bravas.  
Now, I am hungry and excited for this upcoming adventure.  I am trying to plan a return trip in June but do not know if it will work out.  The location of the pop up is in flux and some of the communication is slow.   However, there is a reason they refer to it as the land of manana.  I can be patient and recognize that it all will work out.
Tomorrow is sunrise yoga then a body sctub.  My most favorite thing ever.
Make it a great night!

Sunday, May 8, 2022

mother's day

Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there.  I felt fortunate to text and call a few of my favorite mothers.  I have many friends that chose to be mothers and they excel in this role.  I also appreciate that they retained their identity, their passions, and what makes them unique. 

I say this as I consider the state of this country.  What is being proposed as a reality for what it means to be a woman.  I do not want to reflect more, currently, since that rabbit hole may engulf me.

It is beautiful to choose to be a mother.  To raise a human being.  And you should not have to sacrifice yourself in the process.  A few of my clients made sure to let me know that they took me time today and I think it is amazing.  We all need to be refilling our cups.  Putting our needs, first, so we are able to share with others.  

I think I have been more reflective during the last two years.  What is this shift?  Is is all about pushing back to where we need to be going instead of returning to what we know?  Is there a better way to navigate life?  More opportunity, spirituality, health?

I picked up a book that I do not think I will be able to finish.  It relates to the rust belt and the poverty that has ensued.  I do not like the narrator's voice.  He seems too arrongant and judgmental.  Maybe, I am being judgmental.  I don't know.  I feel like I want to resist this particular author.  

I have managed to avoid most of political b.s. since I do not watch the news.  Still, I see snippets on social media.  It's all a call to action and so I probably should take one day off.  I saw something, today, where a man is running for office inspite of the fact that he killed his wife.  In his defense, his supporters say he has every right to run since he hasn't been charged yet.  WTF?  It is insanity.

I see stuff like that and I want to pull my hair out.  I start seeing red and get heated.  This does nothing for me.  Instead, I fall into the cycle that I am trying to shun.  I really do not want to go there today or ever really.  I know that it is impossible.  At some point, I will have that confrontation of my beliefs and voicing them, unapologetically.

Stand tall with where you a woman, a daughter, mother, sister, friend, girl friend, partner and wife. Do not lost your light to keep the waters calm.

Saturday, May 7, 2022

Yoga, clean eating and excess

Happy Saturday!  I am finding that I love the opportunity to teach at the Park.  It provides rejuvenation, healing and basking in the sunlight.  I love how in touch you can get while practicing outdoors. 

Slowly, momentum is growing and I am feeling better about my decision to teach yoga.  I know that I excel at bringing people together.  I regret not offering group classes earlier in my career.  There is a growing energy of the collective experience that makes it unlike any other yoga class.  Last night, I was at the restaurant and a man came in that I recognized from another local spot that I frequent often.  I could not remember his name and I was not his server.

Eventually, after hearing that his wife was unhappy with her salad, I approached the table.  I asked if they frequent said restaurant and their response was--ah, that is how we know you.  We have been trying to figure out why you looked familiar.  

From here, continuing the conversation it was revealed that I teach yoga.  They seemed interested in attending the Saturday session which I am excited about.  Also, affirmed that I need to be giving out my business card more often.  All of these things that you learn as you navigate entrepreneurship.

The detoxing cleanse is going well.  Recently, I responded to a friend that I want to find a balance between the excess and clean lifestyle.  Benefits of clean eating---productivity (overload), enhanced sleep, clears up skin, save money.  I read more and tackle tasks with a clear mind space.  Excessive habits create contacts, social interactions, creativity.  Plus, I like it.  I enjoy drinking wine at lunch.  I like mezcal.  I love gin and tonics.  If you know me, you know, that I avoided gin for fifteen plus years.  I had a terrible experience in college.   Underage and spending time with my restaurant colleagues, we went to a bar after a shift one night.  Keep in mind, I had a spanish class at 8:30 the next morning.  This class dominated my freshman year.  Five days a week at 8:30.  I would walk to campus which was about a mile away.  I refused to live on campus.

So, I am out with my co-workers.  Drinking who knows what.  I imagine vodka at the juncture in my life.  Some brilliant person decides to buy my a shot of gin. Graciously, I take it because I was enjoying spending time with my colleagues.  

I remember vomiting in the women's rest room.  Then, the men's.  Not a banner moment in my life. The next morning, I woke up.  Thought I was going to die.  It was truly one of the worst hangovers I have ever experienced.  Still, I managed to attend my spanish class.  My participation was dire.  I think I bet one of my co-workers that I would make it to class.  

Oh and fun memories from college, restaurant industry and the overindulgence of alcohol.  From that night, I loathed gin.  Wouldn't touch it.  Regardless, of how much a bartender would say how the gin added a component that vodka would not, I could not enjoy gin.

I don't remember why I returned it.  Maybe, that I discovered the negroni.  Small steps. Now, I do enjoy a gin and tonic on the patio.

There is a balance and I am determined to achieve it.  Monday, I am celebrating with my friend, Brie.  We have successfully met and managed a run/walk.  It is motivating me to run other times during the week.  I feel fantastic!  

I look at my pile of books I would like to read.  It keeps growing.  I just need to lock myself in my room, no phone, no laptop and read a few books.  It needs to be done.

Yoga was fantastic.  I am incredibly thankful for the people who attend my classes and allow me to call them my tribe.  It is a beautiful thing.