April newsletter

 

Live your best life

Live your best life.  What does that mean to you?

For me...it means self-care, positivity, visualization.  I think about this often.  Dream about it.  I have been experiencing vivid dreams.  One in which my accountant called me an entitled bitch.  WTF?  If anything, I gave her a wide avenue to conduct my taxes.

Another where the Warrior Prince reached out and held a sign that said he missed me.  Yes, my subconscious mind has been all over the place.  In the last two days, I have run into acquaintances from a former friendship and experienced wildly different situations.  In one, the tension could cut a knife.  In the other, I was invited to sit with the acquaintance and his friend.  It is interesting.

I can only do me.  I can only focus on living my best life.  Reading, contemplating, honoring the food I ingest and allow in my body. I can send healing vibes to people that need it.  But, I cannot and will not discredit where I am in my journey by backsliding or not acknowledging that I am on a new path.  No more listening to overwhelmingly negative people to make them feel better.  I just won't.

It is crazy.  I can maneuver through my day, feel confident, and then go to sleep and my mind races.  Fear, doubt, shame.  Mostly uncertainty.  It is insane.  I wake up, feeling fine and know that I am making right decisions for myself.  At night, the fear overtakes everything else.

My best life always will be doing what I want.  Taking care of myself and proceeding as needed.  I do hope to journal more and make that more of a habit.  I believe I am on the right path.  I doubt myself, at times, but honestly, know I am being true to myself.  I will always be okay.

The yoga class in the a.m. is something I look forward to weekly.  I am hoping to incorporate a few additional classes.  Maybe a midweek class.  I think that will work out nicely. Even if it is only me attending the classes.  I need to do this for me.

Why limit what I am able to do?  It is insane but likely.  When you go against the grain, it is easier to reform to what is acceptable.  College.  Marriage.  Kids.  House.  I have done one of these things.  One.  I never feel bad about it either.

Find peace with where you are at and thrive!

Detox, basketball, taxes and life

Detox cleanse went well.  Provided insight on how to attempt a balance between eating clean and enjoying life.  Enjoying life.  Meaning enjoying wine and not feeling guilty about it.  

In the last few months, I have had several conversations about alcohol. I have had a few acquaintances die from their reliance on alcohol and a few others come to the edge of it.  It seems accessible in your twenties. If you are hungover it is more manageable than being in your 30's or 40's.  As I have seen friends decide to stop drinking, it is something that is on my mind. I enjoy the socializing aspects of it.  In addition, I enjoy wine with dinner.  That being said, I also enjoy breaks from it.  Maybe to prove that I am not reliant on it.

The last week has been interesting. Lots of celebrating March Madness.  RCJH!  It was an epic game.  I watched it at Elway's with friends.  Then, I watched it again.  And loved it.  I think I floated around my life for three days this week.  

I try to patient and considerate.  If not, compassionate.  My current accountant is frustrating me.  I sent her my information before I left for Florida with the hope that she would address the paperwork in February.  Instead, after reaching out tonight and expressing my need to mentally prepare for the taxes, she asked me two questions that could have been addressed immediately.  Actually, had she reviewed her notes to me, she could have referenced one of the questions she asked.  It was definitely on the irritating side.  I want to be understanding.  I am frustrated and basically waiting to hear back.

I have a trip to Santa Fe on Sunday.  It should be great and necessary.  A little break to reset and identify what is important.  I struggle at times with how to navigate my direction.  Ultimately, I know that everything will be fine and work out.  I question the means.  But, I know I am okay.

I hope to return to cooking more at home and being mindful in some of those decisions.  It is easy to rely on convenience.  However, it is like compounding the calories and maxing out the day. I need to be more mindful of that.  I want to continue to be doing donkey kicks when I am 70, lol.

Life is what you make of it.  If you put your mind to a task, you complete it.  If you focus on distraction, gossip or negativity you stay in that zone.  I want to be moving upward and onward.

Yoga in the park or not

Beautiful day now.  When it started, overcast, chilly and unmotivating. I considered how Saturday might look.  Some of my clients are pushing me to move the Saturday session back outdoors.  

There are many pro's to this.  Start on time instead of ten, fifteen or sometimes thirty minutes late. This has only happened one time but it definitely made an impact on my clients.  I get it.  I do.  They all work during the week and so weekends are a precious commodity.  Not to mention, they are focusing on their health and so starting on time is essential.  Enjoy the sun as you enjoy your savasana.  Take in fresh air as you move from pose to pose.  

The downside to being outside.  Weather is unpredictable.  We have practiced when it was 40 degrees.  Manageable and not terrible until the wind kicked up.  The wind can make or break the experience.  Sometimes there are porta potties available.  Sometimes, there are not. Seems like it would be a minimal issue unless you drive to do yoga and find yourself in a position to need to urinate.  Geese can be aggressive. And we are a little more exposed to the public.  

Doing yoga at the bar enables people watching for me.  I love watching the randomness of Saturday morning folks on Colfax. There is a mix of people.  People walking with coffee who appear productive and making their way to the park, people looking for a place to rest, sit or ask for money, and people with dogs. I never know who I am going to encounter.  It is remarkable and contributes to the beauty of the overall experience.  And, Jordan is a fantastic host.  I appreciate his friendship and the levity he provides.  He always rolls in without a care in the world.  Regardless of the timing, he will sweep to ensure that the space is clean.  An admirable trait, I would say.

I am conflicted because as much I recognize the need to start on time, I cannot predict the weather.  As noted, this morning, the weather was crap.  Yesterday was the complete opposite.  Gorgeous day and I walked City Park and basked in the sunshine.  Today, I walked to my gym and wished that I had worn more clothing instead of capri pants and a hoodie.  

I am considering how to incorporate more group classes.  Maybe small in person sessions in my apartment.  Perhaps, an opportunity to do a midweek class at the park around 4 or 4:30.  Or, offering a class both Saturday and Sunday morning.  I want to be doing more.

The detox cleanse is going well.  I checked my weight today and feel incredible.  Progress and opportunity to continue.  I think I may enjoy a beverage tomorrow while watching the KU games.  the detox is set to conclude on Sunday.  Moving forward, I want to think about how to continue good habits regarding my food intake.  I see how much I rely on take out due to convenience and being lazy.  I could meal prep and benefit.  This week has displayed that. It isn't that much more work either.  It just takes commitment and time.  

I was invited to Spokane for a birthday celebration in July.  The end of June I will be in Kansas for a vow renewal. I see how my year is shaping up.  More travel and celebrations.  I have friends in Peru currently and it is inspiring me figure out an international trip. Stop hiding behind the pandemic and purchase a ticket and just go.

I believe that everything will work out for the best.  I will figure out where to practice tomorrow morning.  Until then, I will focus on how to continue this journey of health and wellness.  There is a balance.  Sometimes, I flirt with the overindulging a little too much. Then, I find myself in this spot.  Needing to detox, reset, reflect.