Recovery days are rough.
I will say it again. Recovery days are rough. I work multiple jobs and for myself. Keeps it fresh and interesting. Sometimes, I have an opportunity to do an overnight event which is what occurred this past weekend. I was hesitant at first. I did not think I would be able to make it work. I teach yoga every Saturday and have since 2020. The class occurs at City Park and is consistently attended. I love it. It is something I look forward to each week.
I signed up for the long catering knowing it would be an 11:30 am in time and a return by 4 am. They convinced me that a pre-set might be a better option. I could stay overnight Friday and Saturday night. I knew some of the other people going up for the weekend. I was excited and agreed to the circumstances. Foolishly.
It is never a correct itinerary or timeline. I thought I could rally and escape unscathed. Silly. I woke up this morning and felt exhausted. I had no desire to get out of bed. I canceled my yoga class. I had to reschedule. There was no way that that class was going to happen.
There is something to be said about working 13-17 hours. Constantly on and never relaxing. I did manage to hydrate somewhat. Yet, it takes its toll. We returned to the accommodations at 4:45 am. I showered {absolutely needed it} and met up with folks afterwards. Drank some wine. There is a window of decompression time. It is necessary. Went to bed around 7:30 am? Woke up at 11, startled. Threw my stuff into the bag and headed out to the shuttle. At this point, I am delirious. Lack of sleep, proper fuel, hydration. I couldn't tell you if I retrieved all of my belongings.
Today was rough. I think tomorrow will be better, but it is taxing on the body to do these events. I didn't fuel properly or sleep enough. I did manage a walk today and a few tasks. Yet, I know that in the future, I will reconsider these choices. My time is more important to me than making money. I cannot get those 72 hours back. Or the amount of crap my body incurred. Taking care of myself is paramount to making money. Money will always be there. Time cannot return.
Make better choices. Follow better people. Spread kindness.
I am invested in this mysterious death and how horrible it is. Leaving a friend to die alone is not what I envision for anyone. There is speculation and rumors. However, it does not change the fact that he died. This young man was a son to parents. He had dreams, habits, goals. His life was discarded for no other reason that he was inconvenient. His parents deserve answers and the truth.
When my boyfriend died, I was devastated. I fell into this empty hole of crap trying to understand why he died. Why (if there was a god) that this would happen. Brian's death was accidental. I knew it immediately. Anger destroys people.
This young man with the unknown death creates anger. Anger at his supposed friends for leaving him at the island if that is the case. Or anger for their rage in his demise. I am disgusted at the notion that they beat him to death and then pissed on his body. I do not understand that rage or entitlement. We are all human beings. I believe in the principles of pursuit of life, liberty and happiness. I want to believe that this man was not killed because he was different.
They are still determining what happened. I vy on the side of there are many things that do not add up. The truth needs to be revealed, and it will.
Still, I won't dismiss that he drowned. There is more to know. More details to learn. Either way, he was alone. They did not call his loved ones to let them know something had happened. That is the chilling disrespectful part. Not knowing where your loved is or how to contact them.
Again, when Brian died, I would have done anything to ensure that he was safe. I was trying to barter with the higher being about protection.
Losing someone is devastating. There is no path forward when you lose your child, your partner, your parent. It is a constant gut punch. It doesn't leave. It just transitions. I will carry my loss for the remainder of my life.
I know I need to sleep and let some of this go. Please spread kindness. Be curious, not comfortable. Many thanks
