Unmotivated

Pretty much sums it up. I should go running tonight; but, I have no interest in that activity. Consider for a moment what it would feel like. I think, last night, at 7:30, it was still 105 degrees. Sounds like perfection, right? Feels like a blowdryer with a touch of wind and of course, the sting of humidity. Ideal for a 6 mile loop...well, sometimes, it is or that is what I convince myself. Today, I am unmotivated. No amount of internal dialogue is going to change that fact. I have corresponded with my running partner, too. I haven't seen him in a few weeks due to other priorities dictating me skipping runs or purely, unmotivated, like tonight. I feel that I will be back on track soon.
I thought about running on the treadmill. I could watch Rescue Me and run--two activities that I enjoy combining when forced to run indoors. I stretched and then got sidetracked by a book. I finished the book and then told myself that I should run with the Thursday night group. I wasn't feeling the treadmill action today. Still, watched Rescue Me, though. I am bummed that that show is ending in a week. Sad episode, last night, for those of you that also watch this fantastic show.
Yesterday, I had plans to run, with said partner, but I had to pick Veronica up from the shop. My beloved Volvo had been dropped off a week ago for a routine tune up. Little did I know that I would be sacrificing most of my birthday budget to make sure that my car would continue to be part of my life. I know how this sounds. It is how I look at it, though. I have had Veronica for six years, almost. Brian picked her out and part of my love for this car is due to that fact. Plus, volvo's are fantastic cars and I try to keep the maintenance up, religiously. Sometimes, when I receive news like I did last Friday, I question my desire to keep the car. Basically, the mechanic told me that my alternator belt broke, my radiator was leaking, possibly a head gasket, oh, and the 180,000 service (tune up) needed to be done. I could understand the belts and possibly the radiator, but him, telling me that I needed a tune up really made me question if they did, in fact, know what was going on with my car. I made the original appointment to have the work done and was very aware of the tune up issue.
Since I was in route to Tucson to explore that gem of a town, I was distracted and told the guy to do everything but the head gasket. I let it go and thought--it's just money and you love this car. Plus, you are going to get it fixed in spite of the ridiculous amount of money.
I spoke to a few people about the quandry and they were all like--don't fix the radiator. Definitely the head gasket is b.s. Call them and tell them to only do the belts and tune up. And, why don't you buy a new car? This one guy said--how old are you? I bet you have decent credit and you could buy a new car--Honda or Toyota--and not have to deal with this.
That is a valid question. This is how I think about it. I love my car. I do not have car payments. My insurance is reasonable and why would I do anything to tie me, responsibility wise, where I am unable to travel? Purchasing a new car is foolish for my type of life. I don't want to be tied down to anything.
Also while walking around the Botannic Gardens in Denver with my friend, Sara, we had a similar conversation. She is hoping to purchase a vehicle and uncertain if she wants an older vehicle that she can pay for on the spot or a new vehicle with payments. Her mom (lovely woman) said--look at Harmony. She knows what she is doing. She doesn't have debt to tie her to a place or situation. But a car that you can afford when you buy it.
Clearly, I love this woman and statement. Very true to my way of life. I like having the opportunity to travel, taste life and explore.
I picked Veronica up yesterday. Paying for the service, sucked, and like I mentioned before limited my birthday plans. Now, I must decide what I can do that is fun and somewhat practical. I mean, I am going to want to do something next month, too. Then, there is the Phoenix 1/2 Marathon and trip to Rocky Point followed by the Las Vegas Half. Must not forget christmas. I always try to spend it elsewhere. Last year, I went to Key West. Delightful color, memories and friends. I met this couple on a wind and wine sail. I ended up having dinner with them. Awesome.
Sorry for the tangent. My running plans, last night, got altered when I decided to day drink to celebrate that my car was back and safe. One beer led to one more and eventually, my day was over. Fun way to spend a Thursday, though.
I remain unmotivated tonight. No running, but I can make dinner or something. There is always tomorrow for the running.....