Question of the day

What is everything is as it should be?  How would that make me feel?

Uncertain.  I am still sussing it out.  November was a challenging month.  I felt conflicted about my direction and that remained the entire month. I questioned why I chose this path, if I should remain on it and if I could do it alone.  

I had someone that had been helping me with the happy hours.  I enjoyed his energy and willingness to be creative with the food.  Plus, he is charismatic and can be incredibly charming.  It added some levity to the situation.  Then, I found that I would be doing it solo.  And it made sense.  I started on this journey on my own and committed to continue.  I would not be derailed without his support.  I would only be derailed if I self-imploded.  And, believe me, I am good at destructing my life.  

December has been more positive and feels lighter.  I feel I recognize my boundaries and how to navigate what I am trying to achieve.  I am getting better.  So in a roundabout way, reflection leads to clarity and moving forward.  I will continue to learn new skills and blog.  Some days maybe mundane and even oversharing.  I cannot feel bad about what I am putting out there.  It would limit my creativity and kill my momentum.  I have done this often in the past and with what result?  Repeating the same pattern. 

I want to move outside of this.  That is what I am realizing and feeling.  It is easy to remain comfortable.  To remain in a space that has already been navigated and established.  But it does not encourage growth.  I want to continue to learn new skills and challenge myself.  I am inspired to create and focus on my logo.  Perhaps have stickers, note cards and t-shirts made.  Maybe even dally with a utube channel.  Fully put myself out there and do yoga.  

I guess I am where I am supposed to be.  And it feels great!  This morning the weather is overcast which is a change. Still warm and manageable to get outside and enjoy the park.  I hope to do that after I have my headlight replaced.  Of course the low beam went out last night.  It is always something, lol.

Here is to consistency and continuing to build. Cheers!