Thursday, November 6, 2014

silly oversights and remembering to think before speaking....

How does the saying go...think before you speak?  Seriously.  I need a filter sometimes.  I say whatever is on my mind and do not consider how it sounds until I get a look or an abrupt departure.  I tell myself that is the beauty of living in the moment and being present.  However, things definitely can be taken out of context even in person.  I mean, I cannot tell you how many times I have questioned a text message for the meaning.  It's hard to construe since there are no voice inflections.
Today, I saw my favorite coffee guy and we were sitting there, chatting, when I mentioned I had wanted to head to Denver this weekend.  I had banking issues to contend with.  I wanted to speak with my previous banker and felt an in person visit was preferable to a conversation on the phone.  Plus, I could visit some friends and drink some of the wine my friends purchased while in Napa this past July.  I told Michael that I felt I could since we got a discount due to my connections of the service industry.  He then asked me if I could get him a discount and I said no.  Sometimes I try to be flippant.
Anyways, he asked me if I just walked around with cash as I had made it sound like I only bank in Denver.  I have a local bank here, which, he did not know.  So, I understood that question.  I had also mentioned, recently, that I hoped to return to Denver at some point as Denver was home to me.  I am not ready to return and I know that.  He doesn't.  He hears me say, I signed a year lease.  I like to travel as often as possible.  Translation (to him), I am not really committed to being here.  However, I am making a life here.
For example,I reached out to Michael last night to see what he was doing.  I was at work, bored.  Slow evening and so I relied on texting to move the night along.  I did not see his response until too late.  He went to my other job looking for me.  Would have been a nice surprise had I told him where I was working.  I had not.  I try to convince him to come to where I am at but he said it was too far.  Seemed silly to me since Santa Fe is a small town.  Today, I mentioned it was not like being in Phoenix and driving 30 miles to see someone.  That is a daily thing there.  At any rate, I further solidified the idiocy by mentioning another guy stopping by my job.  Completely innocent as this guy is a co-worker and younger.  We are friends and I just happen to work at a place he likes to frequent.  Has nothing to do with me.  But, before I could take back what I had just said, my friend, abruptly says, I need to go back to work.  Ciao.
Yea, I am an idiot.  I suppose it is my way of keeping it interesting.....

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